Samson: A Testosterone Poem

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With but a donkey's jawbone He whacked a thousand men And iced yet even more

Samson was a big, strong man,
A big, strong man was he.
He killed a lion with his hands
Like one would squash a flea.
With but a donkey's jawbone
He whacked a thousand men
And iced yet even more
When foes set fire to kin.
He trapped three hundred foxes
And set their tails ablaze
And though men gouged his eyes out
Their temple Samson razed.


But Samson was a small, weak man,
A small, weak man was he.
Just one hot-bodied damsel
Could squash him like a flea.
A rendezvous of passions
Would make his manhood rise
While limp his soul would plummet
Betwixt her willing thighs.
That chink in Samson's armor,
Of hips and lips and breast,
Is a hole through which the blade
Has pierced the church's best.


Samson was a strong, weak man,
A strong, weak man was he,
But erect betwixt two pillars
This blind man came to see.